From the Mailbag - Spring Cleaning

With a glut of new exhibitions this spring comes a glut of unbelievable press releases making universal claims for art’s absolute and unbounded power. Just a picture of a dog and a chair? But of course not:

As with most things ‘Morris’, its not just the obvious that matters, its in the detail, the tonal subtleties… its also confounding that the artist was present, camera in hand, at the only possible moment of perfect equivalence, thought-provoking in itself. The equivalence of dog = chair is perfectly formed by the tonal gradation towards the up-ended ‘underarms’ of both, and most particurlaly the resemblance of the chair’s curvature and drainage point to the dog’s tummy and poochey penis. The artist revels in the simultaneous inflation and deflation of his visual, sculptural and conceptual metaphors, finely tuning bathos and pathos into a mechanism that simultaneously loves and laughs at itself loving.

Amen.

Another artist begs us, in press release form, to “RECOGNIZE YOUR SPIRITUAL NEED”:

Intrigued by a generational trend towards self-perceived liberalism that is often accompanied by a paradoxical close-mindedness towards religion, [the artist’s] tar-dripped sculptures call for a re-examining of contemporary spirituality [....] The exhibition does not promote any dogma or any particular belief but conveys a positive message of hope. Instead, with works like Jesus Save Me, [the artist] hopes to create an instant awareness of the need for the recovery of spiritual values in a chaotic society that is constantly moving more and more towards a profit-oriented world.

What does a ‘re-examining of contemporary spirituality look like’, you might ask?

Recognition for the best exhibition title this month does not go to Jukka Korkeila’s exhibition ‘More Cum for Peace’. No, instead it goes to Daniel Milan’s ‘My feet is not your restaurant’ at Galerie Stephanie Bender in Munich.

But if art’s getting you down and teddy bears covered in tar are not for you, there’s always ceiling fans. And you’re in luck, because Fanimation has just unveiled their 2010 Catalogue, Featuring Nearly 50 Ceiling Fan Families. From the press release:

The new ceiling fan collections include: The Mariano™; The Ventana™; The Cancun™; The Benito™; The Multimax™; and The Akira™. The catalog features stunning product close-ups and images of various accessories such as fan blades, downrods and housings. Also included are Light Kits and Fitters, Decorative Glass Fixtures and Fabric Shades, and other accessories.
Downrods AND housings, at last!

And just to show that I’m not always cynical about getting the odd non-art-related press release, here’s one I think is incredible: JDS Architects have designed this ski-jump, which is not ‘completed’ but apparently already tested and safe for use.

According to the press release:

_On the 3rd of February, the International Ski Federation (FIS) certified the New Holmenkollen Fyr (HS134) that the facility passed all technical and safety standards required for international ski jumping competitions.
On the 3rd of March, Annette Sagen became the first official ski jumper to jump 106.5 meters during the opening ceremony of the Skijump, which set a new Holmenkollen jump record. From the 20 ski jumpers taking part of the opening ceremony, Rune Vetla, a local ski jumper had the longest jump at 141 meters, breaking and currently holding the record at Holmenkollen hill! After this weekend’s event, JDS Architects will continue the remaining work on the completion plans until 2011. At the end of 2010, visitors can enjoy a bar at 418 meters above sea level and get the experience of looking down the in-run like a ski jumper. At the top of the of the 69 meter inclined-cantilever tower, a 110m2 plateau will reveal an amazing view over the city of Oslo and its fjords._

And finally, from the ‘Oh no he di’nt’ section of the mailbag: Pharrell Williams is debuting the new chair he has designed, called ‘The Tank’.

Oh no he di’nt.